5 Step Forgiveness Plan (Step 2)

Last time we explored step 1 in my 5 step forgiveness plan, which is moving beyond the anger to your real feelings and just acknowledging them.  Now we are ready for step 2.

Step 2- Take Care of Yourself

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Now that you know what your real feelings are, and what really hurts, you can take the steps necessary to create healing in yourself.

Figure out what you would need to heal from this hurt you experienced and give it to yourself.  Treat yourself, pamper yourself,  lick your own wounds and make time to take care of yourself. You not only deserve it, but you need it in order to put this burden down.

Often the people who hurt or embarrass us the most aren’t able to, or willing to, heal the hurts they caused.  Waiting around from them to make us feel better, just gives them more power over us. To really move beyond anger and resentment we need to reclaim our power and take back the control over how we feel about ourselves.

So step 2 is do the nice things for yourself that will allow the hurts created by another person to heal.  It may be as simple as treating yourself to a day off, or a mani/pedi, or a new dress.  Or it may take learning to use the word “no” and creating better boundaries in your life so you have less toxic and taxing people in your life.  It doesn’t matter how big or small the gesture is, as long as it aligns with the sad or hurt feelings that are beneath your anger.